Isn't it crazy how some people can drive you to utter madness. To think of the things you do in the name of anger or jealousy. I hope it never comes to that again. I have two years of almost uninterupted peace. I couldn't ask for more peace really. This weekend G and the guys are having a party in Elgin, and I am not 21 years old. Just one more year. It does'nt feel so insignificant but it doesnt mean much now. Im glad ill see the guys before June...Cause i have a secret and i can't wait. It's driving me insane with exhileration. I feel like i could jump out of my skin thinking about it. I don't know if things like this make your past mistakes go away. But i almost feel like i can go back...long before all the madness and drama. I feel like im at peace now though. I don't feel angry or really upset. I feel like wounds have healed over time. And those who sometimes drive me mad are no longer trying to start them anew. So thank you to those people i've been inconsiderate to. Or think i've betrayed them wish my madness. Thank you for now ripping open the scars again when you really really could have. But I feel like i will very soon have some time to rest my soul. I will really find myself now, i can feel it. and there are so many open doors.